Not many people know this, but Erasmus Thump, founder of The Phantom Manufacturing Company, used to drive an automobile from time to time. Of course, a man so enamoured of sporting machines, and two-wheeled ones at that, no average automobile would do. So Erasmus, with Titus' help, constructed a machine of his own design. He managed to enlist Vivian Prestwich of JAP to produce an engine that was made up of four V-twin JAP motors connected together. Of course the end result turned out to be something rather special.

Don't get me wrong, Erasmus loved nothing more than to ride to the works on one of his own Phantom motorcycles. But from time to time, when inclement weather intervened, or if he was attending a formal event in the evening, Erasmus would drive in to work in his self-designed automobile. Though it had no roof to speak of, this was not uncommon in that age. He simply donned a leather flying helmet replete with goggles, and a Hudson Bay slicker over his evening attire, coat, and driving blanket.

No one knows exactly how much power the machine produced or what was its maximum velocity. Although Eramsus never had it officially timed at Brooklands, it was rumoured that Enoch managed to get his hands on the machine and used it in a private race that supposedly won him a small fortune.

The story goes that Enoch had been testing a late prototype of the Fanny Hammer at Brooklands when, as Enoch reported, two gentlemen proffered 'a significant quantity of verbal insubordination' aimed at himself and the FH he was riding. Enoch took great umbrage to this and demanded satisfaction. The two gentlemen, who turned out to be none other than 'Benjy' Benjafield and 'Tiger Tim' Birkin of Bentley Boys fame, accepted Enoch's challenge of a three-lap race to settle the matter. All parties agreed to the conditions of the race and a significant wager was placed by all.

On the day, Mr Benjafield and Mr. Birkin, turned up astride spanking new 1,000cc Zenith Graduas to take on Enoch. Not to be outdone, Enoch, who had been waiting for them by the clubhouse sitting side-saddle on the FH, stood up when the two arrived, and pulled the covers off Erasmus' automobile, saying, 'ready chaps?'

The two Bentley Boys were steaming when they saw the vehicle Enoch intended on using, but he reminded them of the terms of their agreement, where no formal specification had been made about the vehicles to be employed. Needless to say, Enoch had completed the three laps, and a cup of tea, before the two Bentley Boys returned to the paddock. Enoch pocketed some rather substantial cheques and basjked in the respect due to him after such an incredibly brave display of speed. Though his time was not recorded, the two Bentley Boys did everything in their power to convince Erasmus that he should sell them his automobile. But from that moment on, Erasmus ensured that no one else ever got behind the wheel by installing a locking mechanism to the ignition system – the first of its kind! He later confessed to me something to me others had heard Enoch admit in the days just after the race --- that although the machine was extremely fast and powerful, its handling characteristics were quite shocking and its ability to shred or throw tyres was legendary.

The automobile was last been seen in late 1928 with Erasmus at the wheel. After the closure of the Phantom Works in 1929 there was much speculation as to the whereabouts of the machine. But it was never discovered at the time. It was rumoured that Erasmus had intended on giving it to Vivian Prestich and had possibly done so.

Then, seven years ago, Erasmus' great nephew Wilfred was at the family manse rooting about in the loft for family photo albums and what-not. Whilst moving some boxes he came across an enormous metal shape. It turned out to be an enormous, riveted iron chamber for holding water for the house's original, gravity-fed water system. He edged his way around this enormous tank in order to get a sense of its size, when he suddenly spotted something in the gloom. And there is was, partially covered in a Liberty sheet.

How, exactly, the car managed to find itself stuffed into the loft space behind the water tank is still a mystery. But Erasmus' reaction to the discovery was not an overly positive one.

“I simply cannot believe that twerp has sprung from the same seed as myself,” said Erasmus. “I have no doubt that, in his hands, the machine will be wrecked in a week. I mean, he's a dentist for God's sake!”

Enoch was equally scathing of the possibility of Wilfred at the wheel of the machine. 'I have watched young Wilfred from the time of his birth. And never have I witnessed a poorer specimen of a sporting gentleman, or a finer specimen of a dentist, in my life! I am confident that if he tries to drive that savage machine, it will be the death of him and anyone else sharing the same highway.”

As it turns out, Wilfred's wife Bertha was quite insistent that he not attempt to drive the thing. And to this date Wilfred has obeyed her edict. Erasmus' will stipulates that none of his personal possessions or documents are to be put on display for any non-charitable prupose so it is unlikely the machine will be seen any time soon at any motoring event. That is, of course, as long as the machine remains in family hands.

I suppose it is proper to end this report by describing my single personal experience with this automobile. In early Spring of 1928 I was to travel with Erasmus by train to Nottingham where he was to chair a luncheon of fabricators, and foundry and forge owners (or forgers as Erasmus liked to call them). At the last minute before leaving for the station, Erasmus reported that no train would be available due to 'leaves on the line.' but, he claimed, he had a solution.

The car had no proper seats, simply riveted aluminium positions to sit. He placed a number of course horse blankets in mine to soften the ride a bit and to insulate my body from the cold metal. He made me where a leather flying helmet and place goggles over my eyes. He told me that Vivian himself had given him that particular helmet and goggles, a leftover from his days in the RNAS during the Great War.

After a bit of faffing about, Erasmus and one of the lads managed to get the contraption started and what a mighty roar it made!!!! I clasped my little St. Christopher and said a little prayer as we eased onto the roadway. The next thing I knew, Erasmus put his foot to the floor and one almighty din kicked off and a cloud of oil smoke filled my face and lungs, splattering a thing coat of oil droplets all over my goggles and into my hair. I could feel the car swinging from one side to the other before settling into a long, high-speed drone. I say feel, because form that moment on, I was unable to see a thing out of my goggles. The engine roared, the wind whistled, and Erasmus howled in delight all the way to Nottingham. No wonder his wife had never been seen riding along with him!

Upon arrival, which seemed to come very quickly, I checked myself in my mirror and determined that I was in no position to be seen in public in such a state. Erasmus sent me off to a local salon where I might be made presentable. The restoration of my physique was not complete until 4 in the afternoon, by which time the luncheon was over and Erasmus had already begun his drive back home. I was never more than grateful than when I found the first class return rail ticket waiting for me at reception upon completion of my treatment.

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